Dating on a dime. How to date creative in a tough economy or anytime! These are creative and fun idea's for dating on a budget.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Friday, October 17, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
The Power of a Woman
Many books have been written over the years about the powers women have had over men through out history. But, is it still true today? Are women today even aware of their potential power and mystique? As the old saying goes ” You can catch more flies with honey, than you can with vinegar”. I think women these days are so concerned with “getting a boyfriend” or “getting a husband”, that they are willing to do anything, put up with anything, in order to be validated with a man’s love and attention.
I think there is something to be said about old-fashioned values. The days where men had great manners and the ladies were ladies. Ladies in waiting, if you will. If women could just be patient and happy with themselves or their friends, then they would be able to regain their power. It is when we lower our standards and except “crumbs” that we are teaching men how to treat us. We are telling them that we don’t value ourselves as much as we value them. And why, why would any woman do that? Fear of being alone, fear of being unloved or just low self esteem. I can’t tell you how many women today suffer horribly from low self-esteem. And unfortunately, they will pass it on to their children, then their children and so on.
If women only realized how men see them. They see them as goddesses. They see them as an almost mythical creature, that they spend every waking moment trying to figure out how to capture one for their very own. And if women played their cards right…and I don’t mean game playing. I mean, if women would just realize that not being so available would not only make the men value them more, but, it would also help build their own self esteem and ultimately help them regain their power as a woman, then we would be teaching men how we really want to be treated.
I think there is something to be said about old-fashioned values. The days where men had great manners and the ladies were ladies. Ladies in waiting, if you will. If women could just be patient and happy with themselves or their friends, then they would be able to regain their power. It is when we lower our standards and except “crumbs” that we are teaching men how to treat us. We are telling them that we don’t value ourselves as much as we value them. And why, why would any woman do that? Fear of being alone, fear of being unloved or just low self esteem. I can’t tell you how many women today suffer horribly from low self-esteem. And unfortunately, they will pass it on to their children, then their children and so on.
If women only realized how men see them. They see them as goddesses. They see them as an almost mythical creature, that they spend every waking moment trying to figure out how to capture one for their very own. And if women played their cards right…and I don’t mean game playing. I mean, if women would just realize that not being so available would not only make the men value them more, but, it would also help build their own self esteem and ultimately help them regain their power as a woman, then we would be teaching men how we really want to be treated.
Monday, September 8, 2008
Online Dating Do's & Don'ts
There are many online dating sites out there and everyone is doing it. If you are single these days…and you’re looking for a date or relationship, if you’re not dating online, you’re missing out.
The more comfortable we get surfing the web, the more comfortable we get dating online. It is just not as weird and mysterious as it once was…and the stigma is no longer there. In fact, there is more of a stigma if you aren’t dating online...”you are just behind the times”.
But, what is great about online dating is also what is not great about online dating. Your options are endless. So, there are those that just can’t stop looking and perusing their options. Why pick just one…when each day brings someone new to your computer screen. I mean, how great is it to be bombarded with compliments from strangers telling you how beautiful you are, while you read their gushing emails in your dirty t-shirt and sweat pants? It can be addictive. But, it doesn’t have to be. If you are online dating with the simple goal of finding a relationship, then there are basic things to do, not to do and red flags to look out for.
Number one: Take your time and fill out your profile completely.
Number two: Be honest, but, not too honest (it’s a profile, not a therapy session).
Number three: Don’t say that you are looking for someone intelligent and then have misspelled words in your own profile Or misspell intelligent. I have seen that more times than I can count. Always, use spell check!
Number four: Put up at least 3 recent...recent photos. One a bit closer and two body shots..or vice versa. NEVER post photos with your kids, or another person..or God for bid a head shot or you with a celebrity. Win them over with you….just you…an accurate you. I even prefer to “under sell” myself online.... because, if they like what they see online, when I show up in person..they are pleasantly surprised. I think underselling is always best. If you look too great in your picture..or if it is old or has been photo shopped…you are in for getting your feelings VERY hurt when you meet the date in person…and you have to see the look of shock and disappointment on their face. It is true.
Number five: Be open to meeting people outside of your usual “type”. After all, that is the beauty of online dating, you are able to meet people that you might not otherwise ever meet in your day to day life. So, take advantage of the fact that you can explore options that you had never considered before. The nice guy or girl, the geek, the older man or woman, the younger guy, the person with a child. The goal is to find someone with the “inner” qualities that you are looking for first. So, make that the top criteria, when searching the endless profiles. This might help narrow the search substantially.
Number six: Choose wisely and look for red flags. Here are just a few:
Someone who doesn’t have a picture posted and I don’t care what excuse they give you.
Shirtless photos or anything that indicates that they will be WAY more into themselves that they will be ever be into anyone else.
Whe someone emails you for the first time and they don't reference anything specifically about you or your profile. Chances are they’re just shooting fish in a barrel and doing the “copy and paste” to any and everyone that is new or halfway decent.
If they say, “average body type” beware. This is your first clue that they are probably a bit overweight. And that is fine, but just know that going in.
Number seven: Don’t let the emails go on forever. You don’t want to have this great imaginary email relationship…if A) It never produces a real date or B) When you finally meet the person..you suddenly discover they aren’t the person that you let your mind build them up to be…..then it is just a very awkward and disappointing situation for both of you.
Number eight: A few good email exchanges, followed by one brief phone conversation to pick a time and a place to meet…and then cut to the chase. Meet at a neutral public well populated place. Keep this meeting short and sweet, no more than 2 hours.
Number nine: After the date, (if you’re the man) follow up with an email to say if you want to see the person again. If you let her believe you were interested in seeing her again, but, you aren’t…then make sure you send an email to clarify. The same goes for the ladies. DO NOT mislead anyone. There is no point, since you can always be honest in an email. Be honest.
Number ten: If you want to be in a relationship, then do not have sex with anyone that is still actively looking online. Dating sites allow you to see when the last time a person was on the site, use this information to your benefit and be cautious.
There are many many more tips, do’s, don’ts and red flags. Email me if you would like me to help you fine-tune your profile or help you search for that special someone.
Online dating can be a great way to find “the one”, but only if you are playing by the rules and giving it your very best shot.
I’m here to help.
The more comfortable we get surfing the web, the more comfortable we get dating online. It is just not as weird and mysterious as it once was…and the stigma is no longer there. In fact, there is more of a stigma if you aren’t dating online...”you are just behind the times”.
But, what is great about online dating is also what is not great about online dating. Your options are endless. So, there are those that just can’t stop looking and perusing their options. Why pick just one…when each day brings someone new to your computer screen. I mean, how great is it to be bombarded with compliments from strangers telling you how beautiful you are, while you read their gushing emails in your dirty t-shirt and sweat pants? It can be addictive. But, it doesn’t have to be. If you are online dating with the simple goal of finding a relationship, then there are basic things to do, not to do and red flags to look out for.
Number one: Take your time and fill out your profile completely.
Number two: Be honest, but, not too honest (it’s a profile, not a therapy session).
Number three: Don’t say that you are looking for someone intelligent and then have misspelled words in your own profile Or misspell intelligent. I have seen that more times than I can count. Always, use spell check!
Number four: Put up at least 3 recent...recent photos. One a bit closer and two body shots..or vice versa. NEVER post photos with your kids, or another person..or God for bid a head shot or you with a celebrity. Win them over with you….just you…an accurate you. I even prefer to “under sell” myself online.... because, if they like what they see online, when I show up in person..they are pleasantly surprised. I think underselling is always best. If you look too great in your picture..or if it is old or has been photo shopped…you are in for getting your feelings VERY hurt when you meet the date in person…and you have to see the look of shock and disappointment on their face. It is true.
Number five: Be open to meeting people outside of your usual “type”. After all, that is the beauty of online dating, you are able to meet people that you might not otherwise ever meet in your day to day life. So, take advantage of the fact that you can explore options that you had never considered before. The nice guy or girl, the geek, the older man or woman, the younger guy, the person with a child. The goal is to find someone with the “inner” qualities that you are looking for first. So, make that the top criteria, when searching the endless profiles. This might help narrow the search substantially.
Number six: Choose wisely and look for red flags. Here are just a few:
Someone who doesn’t have a picture posted and I don’t care what excuse they give you.
Shirtless photos or anything that indicates that they will be WAY more into themselves that they will be ever be into anyone else.
Whe someone emails you for the first time and they don't reference anything specifically about you or your profile. Chances are they’re just shooting fish in a barrel and doing the “copy and paste” to any and everyone that is new or halfway decent.
If they say, “average body type” beware. This is your first clue that they are probably a bit overweight. And that is fine, but just know that going in.
Number seven: Don’t let the emails go on forever. You don’t want to have this great imaginary email relationship…if A) It never produces a real date or B) When you finally meet the person..you suddenly discover they aren’t the person that you let your mind build them up to be…..then it is just a very awkward and disappointing situation for both of you.
Number eight: A few good email exchanges, followed by one brief phone conversation to pick a time and a place to meet…and then cut to the chase. Meet at a neutral public well populated place. Keep this meeting short and sweet, no more than 2 hours.
Number nine: After the date, (if you’re the man) follow up with an email to say if you want to see the person again. If you let her believe you were interested in seeing her again, but, you aren’t…then make sure you send an email to clarify. The same goes for the ladies. DO NOT mislead anyone. There is no point, since you can always be honest in an email. Be honest.
Number ten: If you want to be in a relationship, then do not have sex with anyone that is still actively looking online. Dating sites allow you to see when the last time a person was on the site, use this information to your benefit and be cautious.
There are many many more tips, do’s, don’ts and red flags. Email me if you would like me to help you fine-tune your profile or help you search for that special someone.
Online dating can be a great way to find “the one”, but only if you are playing by the rules and giving it your very best shot.
I’m here to help.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Finding the “one”
I used to think that I knew who it was I was looking for. You know when you write down all of the qualities that you seek in a partner. Funny, smart, kind, ambitious. I never had on my list…broke, lazy, emotionally unavailable, messy, chaotic, and immature. But, yet, that was exactly the type of person that I kept dating. Now, don’t get me wrong..they didn’t all posses all of those qualities (qualities?) at once. Some had only one of those issues or maybe two. And I could never figure out why I kept ending up with these duds. I would say…”But, that’s not what I wrote down on my wish list.”
Well, I have recently discovered the answer. I may have written down and sincerely hoped for a great guy, a guy who had his life together, A MAN. But, what I wasn’t even aware of…was the fact that I was attracting the exact type of person that was my mirror image. Again, I didn’t have all of those negative issues all at one time…but, I can admit now, that I certainly was NOT equal to the person that I had always dreamed of marrying.
I was immature (check) lazy (at times) broke (too many times) messy (I have animals) and emotionally unavailable (check). Then something magical happened, I met a guy, that at first, I thought I wasn’t interested in….because he was the complete opposite of anyone I had ever been attracted to in the past AND he was a business man! Here’s the magical part..I fell for him and my entire life changed. Not because I married him, no, the relationship didn’t work out. But, here's what he did for me. For the first time in my life, I met a real MAN, who gave me an opportunity to see what life is like when you are an adult, with class and money. So, once I got a taste of that..there was no going backward. I took action. It wasn’t easy, I changed my life..dramatically. I changed careers, I became a responsible adult, I now have a cleaning lady. I have a passion for my business. I am doing very well. Now, I am ready for and equal to the person I have always dreamed of marrying. But, since I am so focused on my business, I’m not looking. And you know what they say about that….well, we’ll see. I’ll let you know.
But, here’s the deal….figure out exactly the type of person you want to be with….inner qualities, lifestyle, class, brains…whatever it is you want in someone else and make sure you take a real..I mean..real..honest look at yourself first. If you need to make changes, make changes. Because until you posses those qualities that you are seeking in someone else, you will never find the person you have always dreamed of marrying. Whew! Too much honesty for one night ☺ Thanks, Jay!
To hear more on this subject...you don't want to miss my internet radio show Aug. 27th at 11am PST. If you miss it, you can download it later. http://www.latalkradio.com and my show is called Love Life Makeovers
Well, I have recently discovered the answer. I may have written down and sincerely hoped for a great guy, a guy who had his life together, A MAN. But, what I wasn’t even aware of…was the fact that I was attracting the exact type of person that was my mirror image. Again, I didn’t have all of those negative issues all at one time…but, I can admit now, that I certainly was NOT equal to the person that I had always dreamed of marrying.
I was immature (check) lazy (at times) broke (too many times) messy (I have animals) and emotionally unavailable (check). Then something magical happened, I met a guy, that at first, I thought I wasn’t interested in….because he was the complete opposite of anyone I had ever been attracted to in the past AND he was a business man! Here’s the magical part..I fell for him and my entire life changed. Not because I married him, no, the relationship didn’t work out. But, here's what he did for me. For the first time in my life, I met a real MAN, who gave me an opportunity to see what life is like when you are an adult, with class and money. So, once I got a taste of that..there was no going backward. I took action. It wasn’t easy, I changed my life..dramatically. I changed careers, I became a responsible adult, I now have a cleaning lady. I have a passion for my business. I am doing very well. Now, I am ready for and equal to the person I have always dreamed of marrying. But, since I am so focused on my business, I’m not looking. And you know what they say about that….well, we’ll see. I’ll let you know.
But, here’s the deal….figure out exactly the type of person you want to be with….inner qualities, lifestyle, class, brains…whatever it is you want in someone else and make sure you take a real..I mean..real..honest look at yourself first. If you need to make changes, make changes. Because until you posses those qualities that you are seeking in someone else, you will never find the person you have always dreamed of marrying. Whew! Too much honesty for one night ☺ Thanks, Jay!
To hear more on this subject...you don't want to miss my internet radio show Aug. 27th at 11am PST. If you miss it, you can download it later. http://www.latalkradio.com and my show is called Love Life Makeovers
Sunday, July 6, 2008
Just Do It!
The road to self-help has many detours and many directions. In other words, there are many options...many routes to take. But, the goal is the same...everyone is trying to get to the same destination, which is called, health and happiness. So, if you are one of those that are constantly seeking this destination...yet it eludes you, then the problem may not be, the route you are taking or the directions that you are following, it just might be that your car is up on one of those mechanic platforms and in the garage. You're in your car, you're steering and giving it the gas, you even have the radio blasting and the windows are down.... but all you are really doing is just spinning your wheels. Your car is out of commission, you aren't leaving the garage. What???
What does this analogy mean? Well, it means that you can go through the motions and you probably think you are doing all you can, to "get there", but, just going through the motions isn't enough. If you can't leave the garage...then it is pointless to do any of the other steps. In other words, you can read all of the self help books you want, you can go to meetings, you can even see a therapist. But, until you...YOU...the inside of you...your brain, until you are ready, willing and able to actually receive the information and put it into action...(not just going through the motions) you are really just wasting your time.
So, how do you really "receive" the information and really begin to make actual changes in your life? The answer is very simple. Maybe too simple, that might be the problem. You stop making excuses and you take action! Now.... not later. You end that bad relationship. You stop dating the bad boys. You throw out the clutter. You exercise. You start making eye contact and smiling at people. You redecorate your place..or move! You find a new career that actually makes you happy! Basically, you take a leap of faith. But, the key is to make real tangible, physical and mental changes. Once you begin this proactive process and you can see the changes right before your very eyes, you will then stay with the process.... and ultimately change your life. You've heard it before...."just do it".
Oprah has said, that she always follows through with everything she wants to do. That means, if she has an idea to do something..she doesn't just talk about it, she does it. And because she has always been a person of "action"..... that is why she is, where she is, today. Change and progress are in the "doing" not in the "planning" or "just talking about it". It is better for you to take a leap of faith and "just do it" with no planning or thinking about it...rather than...talks and plan.... with no action. Just do it....today!
But, if you are still making excuses and not making any progress...is there any hope for you?
Well, I think you have to get to a point in your life, where you are just finally sick and tired of being sick and tired. Too many people get so caught up in the "journey" or "process", that they over look the fact that unless their car can leave the garage.... that all they end up doing for years, is just planning the trip. And then it will get to a point where your friends begin to get tired of hearing you talk about the trip..... that never happens! They will start to distance themselves from you. At first, you will complain...about your friends not being around anymore.... then one day.... when you are all alone and you realize that you've read all of the "books"...and yet your life hasn't gotten any better, in fact, it is worse and you aren't getting any younger...THAT is when you will finally be able to receive help and make great changes in your life. Stop making excuses and start making changes. I have a sign in my bathroom that says "Did you do anything to change your life today?". I look at that sign (that I made) every night before I go to bed and I ask myself that question and when I can answer "yes".... I feel so proud of myself.
So.... did you do anything to change your life today?
What does this analogy mean? Well, it means that you can go through the motions and you probably think you are doing all you can, to "get there", but, just going through the motions isn't enough. If you can't leave the garage...then it is pointless to do any of the other steps. In other words, you can read all of the self help books you want, you can go to meetings, you can even see a therapist. But, until you...YOU...the inside of you...your brain, until you are ready, willing and able to actually receive the information and put it into action...(not just going through the motions) you are really just wasting your time.
So, how do you really "receive" the information and really begin to make actual changes in your life? The answer is very simple. Maybe too simple, that might be the problem. You stop making excuses and you take action! Now.... not later. You end that bad relationship. You stop dating the bad boys. You throw out the clutter. You exercise. You start making eye contact and smiling at people. You redecorate your place..or move! You find a new career that actually makes you happy! Basically, you take a leap of faith. But, the key is to make real tangible, physical and mental changes. Once you begin this proactive process and you can see the changes right before your very eyes, you will then stay with the process.... and ultimately change your life. You've heard it before...."just do it".
Oprah has said, that she always follows through with everything she wants to do. That means, if she has an idea to do something..she doesn't just talk about it, she does it. And because she has always been a person of "action"..... that is why she is, where she is, today. Change and progress are in the "doing" not in the "planning" or "just talking about it". It is better for you to take a leap of faith and "just do it" with no planning or thinking about it...rather than...talks and plan.... with no action. Just do it....today!
But, if you are still making excuses and not making any progress...is there any hope for you?
Well, I think you have to get to a point in your life, where you are just finally sick and tired of being sick and tired. Too many people get so caught up in the "journey" or "process", that they over look the fact that unless their car can leave the garage.... that all they end up doing for years, is just planning the trip. And then it will get to a point where your friends begin to get tired of hearing you talk about the trip..... that never happens! They will start to distance themselves from you. At first, you will complain...about your friends not being around anymore.... then one day.... when you are all alone and you realize that you've read all of the "books"...and yet your life hasn't gotten any better, in fact, it is worse and you aren't getting any younger...THAT is when you will finally be able to receive help and make great changes in your life. Stop making excuses and start making changes. I have a sign in my bathroom that says "Did you do anything to change your life today?". I look at that sign (that I made) every night before I go to bed and I ask myself that question and when I can answer "yes".... I feel so proud of myself.
So.... did you do anything to change your life today?
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Sex & Marriage?
What does it mean to be in a happy marriage? And is it normal for couples to rarely have sex or in many cases, not all, when they have been married for several years? What is normal sexual activity in a marriage? Is sex an important part of marriage? It should be!
I personally think, it is crucial to keep the sex and the passion alive in any relationship; long-term committed or marriage. Why? Because otherwise if the couple doesn't keep it fresh, doesn't keep the passion alive, then they just become relatives. To me, the reason to be bound with someone in marriage, is to make a permanent commitment to someone you love, respect and enjoying making love, to. The expression that comes out of that love and respect, is sex or making love. People seem to feel the need to get married and have a permanent connection with someone, only to drift apart and let their sexual intimacy and passion wane. I’m not sure why anyone would want to get married and then just be friends with his or her partner. What's the point of being married and not having sex with your partner and not being able to have sex with anyone else? At least that’s what it means to be in a conventional marriage. When you and your partner are very rarely having sex, usually, it is often the case that one person in the relationship and sometimes even both partners in the relationship, will go outside of their marriage for sex. And of course, this ultimately creates a wedge between the couple, which inevitably could lead to the demise of their entire marriage.
So why do people turn off their sex drive once they get married? I realize, that priorities shift once you become married. Children for example, enter the picture and often times, this leaves the couple with very little private time. At least, that is what couples tell me. So, here is what I say about that, why not steal moments with your partner as if you were doing something tawdry and wrong? Make it more of an "us against them" when it comes to you and your spouse and your children. Maybe the kids are playing in the backyard and you and your husband or wife, can run into the bathroom for two minutes for a quick and spontaneous lovemaking session. Or maybe it’s just simply 15 seconds of a crazy make-out session. If you’re in a happy marriage where you find that your partner is the love of your life, you respect them, you're best friends with them, you have children with them, why not make having sex with them one of the top priorities? What do you have to lose?
I’m sure the romance is not as hot as it was in the very beginning of your courtship and because you’re older, because you now have more responsibilities, money issues, children, stress, and lack of sleep. But, that’s is exactly why you need to make romance, passion and sex, much higher on your list of priorities, that is, if you want to keep your marriage, your love life alive.
I’m sure the romance is not as hot as it was in the very beginning of your courtship and because you’re older, because you now have more responsibilities, money issues, children, stress, and lack of sleep. But, that’s is exactly why you need to make romance, passion and sex, much higher on your list of priorities, that is, if you want to keep your marriage, your love life alive.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
The Approach
I have been having discussions lately with men and women on the subject of…..”How does a man approach a woman in a social setting?” “Or why doesn’t a man approach a woman in a social setting?”
You always hear beautiful women on T.V. say “I can’t get a date.” and “Men are just too afraid to approach me.” I really find it extremely hard to believe, that if Cindy Crawford or Heidi Klum were in a bar and not famous..that most men wouldn’t be chatting them up right and left and asking them out.
I’m not sure if I believe in this “he’s too imtimidated” thing. I do believe that many men when they see an attractive woman may not approach her because they think she might be in a relationship…but, again, I say..if she were Heidi Klum..he’d give it a shot anyway.
But, what to do if you are not Heidi Klum or Cindy Crawford? Well, it seems the easiest way to convey interest to a man from across the room (without, you approaching the man) is to make eye contact….real and direct eye contact, for what might seem like an eternity (about 5 or 10 secs) and give him a smile. The tactic that I have used for years is to smile and chat with the other guy, that I'm not interested in...and you know what always happens...that is the guy, that will end up asking me out. Why, because I smiled and made eye contact with him, the guy I wasn't interested in. So, clearly the tactic that I have been using to get the cute guy I like, to ask me out..doesn't work. But, it does, if you want to go out with his unattractive friend. Just go after what you want.
I mean really, what have you got to lose? Who cares if he thinks you are staring at him…you are! He will either be a man and approach you or he won’t, it’s as simle as that. Now, what do you have to lose by not making eye contact and giving him a signal that you are available and interested? Well, how about a possible date with a cute guy, for starters. And men..are you really intimidated or just not interested enough to take action?
I agree with the adage that says: It's better to act and to regret / Than to regret not to have acted. - Mellin de Saint-Gelais
You always hear beautiful women on T.V. say “I can’t get a date.” and “Men are just too afraid to approach me.” I really find it extremely hard to believe, that if Cindy Crawford or Heidi Klum were in a bar and not famous..that most men wouldn’t be chatting them up right and left and asking them out.
I’m not sure if I believe in this “he’s too imtimidated” thing. I do believe that many men when they see an attractive woman may not approach her because they think she might be in a relationship…but, again, I say..if she were Heidi Klum..he’d give it a shot anyway.
But, what to do if you are not Heidi Klum or Cindy Crawford? Well, it seems the easiest way to convey interest to a man from across the room (without, you approaching the man) is to make eye contact….real and direct eye contact, for what might seem like an eternity (about 5 or 10 secs) and give him a smile. The tactic that I have used for years is to smile and chat with the other guy, that I'm not interested in...and you know what always happens...that is the guy, that will end up asking me out. Why, because I smiled and made eye contact with him, the guy I wasn't interested in. So, clearly the tactic that I have been using to get the cute guy I like, to ask me out..doesn't work. But, it does, if you want to go out with his unattractive friend. Just go after what you want.
I mean really, what have you got to lose? Who cares if he thinks you are staring at him…you are! He will either be a man and approach you or he won’t, it’s as simle as that. Now, what do you have to lose by not making eye contact and giving him a signal that you are available and interested? Well, how about a possible date with a cute guy, for starters. And men..are you really intimidated or just not interested enough to take action?
I agree with the adage that says: It's better to act and to regret / Than to regret not to have acted. - Mellin de Saint-Gelais
Click to hear my on air discussion from todays show
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
Thursday, March 6, 2008
My New Internet Radio Show
I'm not sure if you've checked out my new internet show on http://www.bbstalkradio.com
My show is called "Love Life Makeovers" You can call in and listen live every Wednesday morning at 11am PST. I have a new guest on each week to discuss all things "Love" related.
If you would like to be a guest on my show. Email me and let me know.
Click here to listen to my first show http://www.bbstalkradio.com/images/Gina-022708.mp3
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
Monday, February 4, 2008
Dating with modern technology
These days with all of the gadgets and gizmo’s out now our lives should be easier..right?
Well, when it comes to dating, it seems that some technology has been proven to be very useful for dating, while the misuse of technology has made dating more difficult and frustrating.
For example, online dating is a great way to meet people you might not ordinarily meet in your day-to-day life. You see someone you like on a dating site and send them an email. And because of email; you are now able to communicate faster and in a more private way. Rather than giving out a phone number to a complete stranger, giving out your email address is a safer alternative. However, it can also be a very impersonal way to communicate with someone. Often times on dating sites, you might come across the person that seems to just send emails with absolutely no interest in taking the next step. This is also true with people you meet anywhere.
If you are at the point where someone has your telephone number as well as your email...yet they still just email, then something’s wrong. Either they are not really available or they are not really interested in you. Getting email from someone you are interested in is fun at first. But, if it becomes the only means of communicating, then someone is going to get bored and eventually loose interest. Then there are text messages. Obviously, if someone is texting you, then they have your phone number. Texting is a great way to flirt and just say a quick “hi” “ I’m thinking about you”. But, if it is being over used and not in combination with real phone calls…it becomes obvious very quickly, that the “texter” is just playing games and killing time. Not to mention..running up your text-messaging bill!
How did people date before answering machines, cell phones and computers? Well, since they didn’t have the modern day conveniences we do, people had to make an EFFORT to get together with someone. They had to mean it, when they said, “I’ll call you” or ‘Want to go out next week?” Because it was harder to make contact, plans had to be made in advance and kept. When someone picked you up for a date….that was it, it was just the two of you..no interruptions. No cell phones to answer, no texts to send out. If you are not a doctor or a single parent, I see no reason to even bring your cell phone on a date. Period.
Dating with modern technology in review
1. If you have someone’s phone number or they have yours...call to ask them out or cancel a date. No emails or text when it comes to making or canceling plans.
2. Don’t over text. Say “Hi” or ‘I’m thinking about you” or ‘I’m late’. Anymore than that….call them.
3. No cell phones on dates. If you have to bring it, keep it in the car.
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
Well, when it comes to dating, it seems that some technology has been proven to be very useful for dating, while the misuse of technology has made dating more difficult and frustrating.
For example, online dating is a great way to meet people you might not ordinarily meet in your day-to-day life. You see someone you like on a dating site and send them an email. And because of email; you are now able to communicate faster and in a more private way. Rather than giving out a phone number to a complete stranger, giving out your email address is a safer alternative. However, it can also be a very impersonal way to communicate with someone. Often times on dating sites, you might come across the person that seems to just send emails with absolutely no interest in taking the next step. This is also true with people you meet anywhere.
If you are at the point where someone has your telephone number as well as your email...yet they still just email, then something’s wrong. Either they are not really available or they are not really interested in you. Getting email from someone you are interested in is fun at first. But, if it becomes the only means of communicating, then someone is going to get bored and eventually loose interest. Then there are text messages. Obviously, if someone is texting you, then they have your phone number. Texting is a great way to flirt and just say a quick “hi” “ I’m thinking about you”. But, if it is being over used and not in combination with real phone calls…it becomes obvious very quickly, that the “texter” is just playing games and killing time. Not to mention..running up your text-messaging bill!
How did people date before answering machines, cell phones and computers? Well, since they didn’t have the modern day conveniences we do, people had to make an EFFORT to get together with someone. They had to mean it, when they said, “I’ll call you” or ‘Want to go out next week?” Because it was harder to make contact, plans had to be made in advance and kept. When someone picked you up for a date….that was it, it was just the two of you..no interruptions. No cell phones to answer, no texts to send out. If you are not a doctor or a single parent, I see no reason to even bring your cell phone on a date. Period.
Dating with modern technology in review
1. If you have someone’s phone number or they have yours...call to ask them out or cancel a date. No emails or text when it comes to making or canceling plans.
2. Don’t over text. Say “Hi” or ‘I’m thinking about you” or ‘I’m late’. Anymore than that….call them.
3. No cell phones on dates. If you have to bring it, keep it in the car.
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
Monday, January 14, 2008
Are your expectations realistic?
This is a very important question to ask. When you think of your future, whom do you see yourself with when you’re 80? Or are you just thinking of “right now”? If it is your ego talking then probably you would say..”I see myself with someone fit, tall, great smile, loves rock music, owns the new I phone and is very very sexy.’ And why? Why are those things the most important things to your ego? Well, because, the ego by definition means: An exaggerated sense of self-importance; conceit.
To put it another way: Are your expectations of a potential partner based on what is in your heart or is it based on how you want to be perceived by other people? Because I know when you’re 80, you’re not going to care if he was ever a rock star or if she was ever a super model. So think about what is really most important. If you’re looking for a long-term relationship, then you have to be realistic. That means that you have to ask yourself, “If everyone on this planet looked the same and dressed the same and had the same income…..what qualities then, would I be looking for?” And do YOU have the same qualities to offer the other person? Because, if you’re expectation is for a perfect model, then you also need to be a perfect model. Right? Let’s face it, if you’re over weight, average looking and don’t have a lot going for you, other than you’re a nice person…well, let’s just hope and pray….you’re not waiting for “George Clooney or Eva Longoria” to come along.
There are just as many women out there as there are men, who seem to have a strange sense of entitlement, when it comes to being choosy about a mate. It is great to be picky and have standards…but, make sure you are being honest with yourself and that your standards aren’t higher than what you have to offer in return.
Be realistic and think outside of the stereotypes. Let go of unrealistic expectations, throw away your checklist and allow yourself to fall in love with someone’s inner qualities. The only way to do that is by giving different people a chance..a real chance, it takes more than one date to fall in love, sometimes it takes ten, fifteen or even twenty. Love at first sight rarely happens, the best type of love is the love that develops over time and is based on the soul, not the outer shell.
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
To put it another way: Are your expectations of a potential partner based on what is in your heart or is it based on how you want to be perceived by other people? Because I know when you’re 80, you’re not going to care if he was ever a rock star or if she was ever a super model. So think about what is really most important. If you’re looking for a long-term relationship, then you have to be realistic. That means that you have to ask yourself, “If everyone on this planet looked the same and dressed the same and had the same income…..what qualities then, would I be looking for?” And do YOU have the same qualities to offer the other person? Because, if you’re expectation is for a perfect model, then you also need to be a perfect model. Right? Let’s face it, if you’re over weight, average looking and don’t have a lot going for you, other than you’re a nice person…well, let’s just hope and pray….you’re not waiting for “George Clooney or Eva Longoria” to come along.
There are just as many women out there as there are men, who seem to have a strange sense of entitlement, when it comes to being choosy about a mate. It is great to be picky and have standards…but, make sure you are being honest with yourself and that your standards aren’t higher than what you have to offer in return.
Be realistic and think outside of the stereotypes. Let go of unrealistic expectations, throw away your checklist and allow yourself to fall in love with someone’s inner qualities. The only way to do that is by giving different people a chance..a real chance, it takes more than one date to fall in love, sometimes it takes ten, fifteen or even twenty. Love at first sight rarely happens, the best type of love is the love that develops over time and is based on the soul, not the outer shell.
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Men, start this New Year out right!
It is a brand new year and if you are like the majority of people in Los Angeles, then you are single. Is this by choice? Or is it because the women you are interested in, only see you as a friend? If the women you are attracted to, seem to always see you as a friend, then clearly you are doing something wrong.
Here are some simple things you can do to take charge and stop that from happening again!
You have to establish your intentions from the beginning. You’re not going to say it with your words, you’re going to say it with your actions.
Step 1. First and foremost, you have to have confidence.
Step 2. Don't take the passive approach. Come up with creative and fun things to do---be original, call her up and ask her out.
Step 3. Always picker her up.
Step 4. Never let her pay
Step 5. Always walker to her door
Step 6. Open all doors for her and let her go first
All of the above steps are a great start...but, just having great manners isn't enough. She has to see you in a romantic way...so you have to be romantic and cross that "friendship" line.
Here are some ways to do that:
Holding hands: Take the initiative and take her hand when the two of you are crossing a street or walking to the car at the end of the night.
Flirting: whisper in her ear..."you look beautiful"..or when you're not with her send her a flirty text...."just thinking about how hot you looked the other night...can't wait to see you again"
By taking all of these steps you are sending her the message that you are in charge, that you care about her well being and that you see her in a sexual way. She will respect you as a man and you will definitely get her attention, she will see you as a “date” not just as a “friend”.
Good Luck and Happy New Year!
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
Here are some simple things you can do to take charge and stop that from happening again!
You have to establish your intentions from the beginning. You’re not going to say it with your words, you’re going to say it with your actions.
Step 1. First and foremost, you have to have confidence.
Step 2. Don't take the passive approach. Come up with creative and fun things to do---be original, call her up and ask her out.
Step 3. Always picker her up.
Step 4. Never let her pay
Step 5. Always walker to her door
Step 6. Open all doors for her and let her go first
All of the above steps are a great start...but, just having great manners isn't enough. She has to see you in a romantic way...so you have to be romantic and cross that "friendship" line.
Here are some ways to do that:
Holding hands: Take the initiative and take her hand when the two of you are crossing a street or walking to the car at the end of the night.
Flirting: whisper in her ear..."you look beautiful"..or when you're not with her send her a flirty text...."just thinking about how hot you looked the other night...can't wait to see you again"
By taking all of these steps you are sending her the message that you are in charge, that you care about her well being and that you see her in a sexual way. She will respect you as a man and you will definitely get her attention, she will see you as a “date” not just as a “friend”.
Good Luck and Happy New Year!
About Gina
Gina is the owner of Selective and Single, a Los Angeles based personal matchmaking service specializing in individual needs for an upscale affluent clientele. If you have any questions you would like to ask Gina, feel free to email her at info@selectiveandsingle.com or to get more info on Selective and Single go to http://www.selectiveandsingle.com
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