I used to think that I knew who it was I was looking for. You know when you write down all of the qualities that you seek in a partner. Funny, smart, kind, ambitious. I never had on my list…broke, lazy, emotionally unavailable, messy, chaotic, and immature. But, yet, that was exactly the type of person that I kept dating. Now, don’t get me wrong..they didn’t all posses all of those qualities (qualities?) at once. Some had only one of those issues or maybe two. And I could never figure out why I kept ending up with these duds. I would say…”But, that’s not what I wrote down on my wish list.”
Well, I have recently discovered the answer. I may have written down and sincerely hoped for a great guy, a guy who had his life together, A MAN. But, what I wasn’t even aware of…was the fact that I was attracting the exact type of person that was my mirror image. Again, I didn’t have all of those negative issues all at one time…but, I can admit now, that I certainly was NOT equal to the person that I had always dreamed of marrying.
I was immature (check) lazy (at times) broke (too many times) messy (I have animals) and emotionally unavailable (check). Then something magical happened, I met a guy, that at first, I thought I wasn’t interested in….because he was the complete opposite of anyone I had ever been attracted to in the past AND he was a business man! Here’s the magical part..I fell for him and my entire life changed. Not because I married him, no, the relationship didn’t work out. But, here's what he did for me. For the first time in my life, I met a real MAN, who gave me an opportunity to see what life is like when you are an adult, with class and money. So, once I got a taste of that..there was no going backward. I took action. It wasn’t easy, I changed my life..dramatically. I changed careers, I became a responsible adult, I now have a cleaning lady. I have a passion for my business. I am doing very well. Now, I am ready for and equal to the person I have always dreamed of marrying. But, since I am so focused on my business, I’m not looking. And you know what they say about that….well, we’ll see. I’ll let you know.
But, here’s the deal….figure out exactly the type of person you want to be with….inner qualities, lifestyle, class, brains…whatever it is you want in someone else and make sure you take a real..I mean..real..honest look at yourself first. If you need to make changes, make changes. Because until you posses those qualities that you are seeking in someone else, you will never find the person you have always dreamed of marrying. Whew! Too much honesty for one night ☺ Thanks, Jay!
To hear more on this subject...you don't want to miss my internet radio show Aug. 27th at 11am PST. If you miss it, you can download it later. http://www.latalkradio.com and my show is called Love Life Makeovers